Jim Says...
            
                If I was a duck, I probably wouldn't give a quack.
              
                        Jim Says...
            
                Star of the "B" grade movie "And The Horse You Rode In On" now playin' at a drive in near you.
              
                        Jim Says...
            
                If you're going to town, bring me a jug of Sweet Betty and a big stack of hundred dollar bills.
              
                        Jim Says...
            
                Moe Bandy said ole Hank Williams wrote his life. If I could find the dude that wrote my life, I'd shoot him.
              
                        Jim Says...
            
                I hate to harp on it, but I'm sick an tired of being sick an tired.
              
                        